Living in AZ the past year has been fun, interesting and very unproductive. As my savings become exhausted, as the speeches I give (for free) become more angry and as the great book I'm writing just has hundreds of pages saying "all play and no work make Ares a poor boy", I have made a decision to move. I tried to resist, Lloyd tried to stop me, but I was born a rambling man.On Saturday, the movers come and take my burdensome possessions to storage. Monday, I hitch a trailer to my truck hauling stuff I really need and head to the Canada of Arkansas: Missouri.
I went to high school in St. Louis, graduated from Mizzou, then hightailed it out of there as fast as I could, first to Austin, Texas, for more school, then Dallas, then LA. Here in Arizona, the faint ocean breezes coming from the Pacific, as well as the six-hour drives, have kept me sane. Well, that's arguable. Now I'll be truly landlocked and whatever sex I want will have to be with very white, very fat, fly-over chicks who would rather be standing in line for Six Flags. But wait, it gets worse.
My folks have toughed it out in Missouri. But they are smart enough to spend their winters in Florida. So there is a big empty shining house on the hill waiting for me, my drums, my CD's, my "book" and my shrunken ego. I have until May to get re-established before the parents return to re-live the masochism of my youth. On the plus side, I still have a brother, and friends (and ex-girlfriends) in the state of Misery and a promise of eternal salvation, so at least I got that going for me. On the down side, I can't find my winter coat. Do I even have a winter coat? What's winter?
Therefore, for at least a while, you won't have me to kick around anymore on this underrated blog. Just when it was getting fun and angry. On the other hand, it's just two and half guys agreeing with each other. Whatever happened to the other miscreants?
Why in fuck would I return to MO? Why not? One reason is that it would buy me time in pursuing my dream - to be the Man, not work for the Man. Also, someone who I don't see enough lives in the real Canada, my nine year old daughter (pic above), and this brings me that much closer.
Why in fuck would I share all this? Why not? I could use a virtual shoulder to cry on. Also, it would be a bit frightening to have Odes muttering to himself about all the goddam shit in this fucked up world and it would all be ok if he could just wipe out some choice American cities. Which makes we wonder - where was Odes when Katrina hit?
Goodbye, cruel virtual world.
10 comments:
Bummer....
Missouri. Yeah. That's a fucker... and I should know. I'm sitting at my desk right now in Kansas City, Missouri.
I'll say this about the cow-poke pussy, though. They have low standards. You should see the fat-fuck, ugly guys walking around with hoties on their arms. Compared to West Coast chicks, they're much less complicated and easy going. They seem to be very much at home with a pork rib in one hand and a beer in the other. That would account for the larger types.
Well, Drewcifer has my email if you find a need. We're gunning it down to the Lake of the Ozarks every chance we get. Nice getaway. Drunks.
Happy trails. The blog won't be the same, well, it won't be at all.
And for God's sake, enjoy that house on the hill.
Kansas City? Wow, you understand.
I went there only once - to see the young U2 at the Uptown Theater in 81 or 82. And Lake of the Ozarks - lots of great memories there. One thing about Missouri that they don't really have out west is the great lakes and rivers. I expect I'll be going there for the mountain biking as well. I understand they built some great trails.
Thanks for the encouraging words - I could use some low standard pussy. As for the blog, I've enjoyed the free form rants. I spend a lot of time writing more, um, serious, stuff. As I write here, I like to picture myself naked, painted bright blue, carrying the severed heads of other bloggers, threatening civilization with a big sharp keyboard.
If anyone is still around here, I'm sure I'll be back to give, and receive, more abuse. I just can't escape the pleasure/pain cycle.
The mothership awaits . . . .
They don't have the Internet in MO?
Ok, guys, I've been thinking about this. I’ve been a bad blog master but I have a good excuse. I’m hitting too many blogs when I should just focus on this one.
On the other hand you guys didn’t need any help. But now I see a need for intervention. We mustn’t let the camaraderie become cosmic flotsam and jetsam. I haven’t even gotten into the mix yet!
Ares, seriously you can’t fucking afford dial up in Mo? Last time I checked they had cable TV. Are you saying you are retiring from the virtual scene because of …. Why again? BTW Tavia and I think the picture simplifies the move; and that it is a noble and wise one. For what that is worth.
So before I let you go without a fight so again explain the whole internet complication to me. You better be back to Eutopia bitch.
Odes, Ok it is 1 and a half now. I’ll try to pull the weight if I must. Maybe we can recruit some new meat. Send me e-mails, I’ll send invites. I think it is time for Tavia to put her touch into the blog. It is actually “our” blog. We have a pre-nup and everything. She has been observing but strangely absent. Sort of creepy I know, just lurking out there in a virtual cave. BTW, enjoyed the Gunter references. I remember.
Finally, I have to go to B-ville, I have family in KC and I have friends in that God forsaken state. I think it is time to firm up a visit in the next 90 days. Let’s decide a place and time and hook up to drink whiskey, howl at the moon and paint the town a nice violet.
Peace.
Nine Comments:
1. Thank you for responding to my virtual cry for help. I admit that I was being a bit of a drama queen. Or King, actually. But sometimes being willing to walk away is key to getting what you want.
2. Yes, they have internet in MO.
3. Would I have to tone down my violent and mysogynistic discourse now that I know a girl is looking over my shoulder?
4. Please let's do this right or not at all. I feel like I'm having some sort of perverted tryst with Odes - and I don't even know if he's my type.
5. Thank for acknowledging my noble motive for being closer to Stephanie. By the way, if you're curious, she's not Morman - she's wearing a homemade Halloween costume.
6. I have some friends in MO that are literate and I will invite their participation. Well, I went to college with them anyway.
7. Join the party, Tavia!
8. I forgot; excuuuuuse me.
9. Is "peace" the new "cazart?" You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means. I always thought it conveyed: "Oh shit. I should have known that!" Not a proper valediction (look it up).
I beg to remain, Sir, your most humble and obedient servent,
Ares
Two comments:
1. I see that there are now 68 posts on this blog (per the sign in page). Is there any significance to being the one that does 69?
2. I read my earlier 9-comment post, and I realized that I can be an asshole sometimes.
Cazart can mean anything you want it to, per HST. You are correct, originally it means ah shit, I shoudl have known. I liek to use it like Fuck or Dude.
But the ticket, take the ride.
Drama king. Blog when she's sleeping.
I will be in Bentonville the weekend of 2/9-2/12.
Anyone game?
That's my birthday. I'll be at the Lake of the Ozarks drinking and smoking heavily. You should come up. It's a few hours, but worth the trip.
Yep. They'll need warm coats and fishing poles.
I'm gonna try to make it. I'll drive up Sat.
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